cblj_backup | (no subject)

I went to bed at 11 o'clock tonight. I don't often have nightmares, especially ones that aren't visibly about the places where my psyche's a bit tender, and I never have dreams I jumpstart awake from. I was dreaming about being at our places in Texas, and about being attacked by a crocodile.

A CROCODILE. I KNOW, RIGHT?

But it was just small enough that it had got its teeth into my left hand and was thrashing around, ripping my hand up. Like, really going to town on it. I couldn't feel a lot of pain but I did feel some -- I suspect I was sleeping on my hand or something -- and I was lying there on our front drive screaming at the police, who kept circling the block past our street but didn't see me. In the defence of the police in my head, our street is very hard to find. I get lost in our neighbourhood all the time.

Finally the thing pulled my hand off -- I want you to think about the amount of typing I do, and then re-read the phrase pulled my hand off -- and I jumped awake. I'm pretty sure I swore a lot.

So, I'm sitting here on my bed, staring at my hand where I can still feel teeth digging in, for about five minutes, taking a break before I go back to sleep. And the phone rings. Remember my phone? The one that, when it rings, is the Daleks screaming TARDIS in four part harmony? It's loud and startling on purpose, so I'll hear it.

And I answer, because nobody's calling me at half past midnight on Sunday unless something's very wrong, and that much adrenaline makes you blind to little social reminders like "check caller ID".

And it is my brother. Calling me. At half past midnight on a Sunday night. To ask me for money.

Now, the initial thing to say is, it's good that he's done this before and already knows I hate and repudiate him, because it comes as no surprise when I tell him to rot and die and then hang up (usually he has his wife call me back and leave a message about how I'm going to hell). This is a ritual; it happens every six months or so. Normally he calls when it's a decent hour in Chicago. Maybe he did the math wrong this time.

Anyway. Aside from all that, I know there's a bit of the witch in my mum and events like tonight make me perpetually wonder if there's a bit of the witch in me.

I could do with more useful premonitions, mind you.

Back to bed for me. Thank you, internet, for filling my brief need for a therapist and/or spiritual advisor.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Weeeell, common mythy-type belief does say something like "if your left palm is itchy, you will be giving money away" so ...maybe this crocodile is your subconcious representation of your brother trying to make your palm itchy so you'll give him money, and instead ripping it off/annoying you to the point you wouldn't ever give him money for anything? Lack of help from authority figures probably being something like there's not really an authority that can make him stop? Which sounds like it suits the situation but I have no real idea about your family situation. I don't know why your brother would be a crocodile though. Is he in an area particularly known for crocodiles, maybe Australia or Egypt?

Aside from all that, I know there's a bit of the witch in my mum and events like tonight make me perpetually wonder if there's a bit of the witch in me.

Probably. Or you slept through the ringing on his first phone call five minutes earlier. ;-)

He does, in fact, live in Australia! Or at least he did the last time Sam posted about him.

Well, he's in Australia, which I guess is a bit associated with crocodiles (viz: Dundee).

Yep. As well as kangaroos and wallabies, but of the three a crocodile is the most sensible one to be biting your hand off. You have a sensible subconcious, even when it's prognosticating. :-)