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Overheard in the airport today: "He was a preacher and he'd had six bypasses, and he was going to Vegas with his wife when she broke her hip, and I was left holding this body!"

I spent the rest of the flight wishing I'd turned around and demanded that woman tell me the full story of the cardiac preacher, his fragile wife, their aborted Vegas trip, and what body?

I also spent much of the flight sleeping in order to escape from the two dreadful women I sat with, one of whom asked me to buckle her safety belt for her (I told her I'd call a flight attendant, she was creeptastic and turned out to be a holy roller). The other one asked if I could put her bags in the rack for her and the only reason I did was that she looked like she had low muscle tone and was trying to lift a bag directly over a woman holding a sleeping baby. I decided I would take responsibility for that child not growing up brain damaged from falling luggage, and helped her with her bag.

The flight got in early, which was nice, and when I arrived home dinner was nearly ready. My sister's Sullen Emo Boyfriend was there for Christmas dinner, but he turned out to be quite nice and we had a reasonably intelligent discussion about the ruination of the radio industry after a post-dinner viewing of a film called Pirate Radio, which was brilliant if a trifle naive.

Anyway he seems like a decent young guy and is probably too busy doing his hair and contemplating his manpain to be a dick to my sister, so I'll let him live.

And now I am supposed to be sleeping, so I'd better get on that. Hope everyone had as...intriguing a holiday as I did today.

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Apparently you were giving off too many nice guy vibes on the plane if people kept asking for your help. I am perplexed about what sort of person over the age of six asks for help with a seat belt. I can imagine some explanations, but it takes almost as much creativity as coming up with an explanation for that overheard snippet.

Glad the sullen emo guy turns out to be decent enough to escape murder! Merry Christmas to you and your family.

Y HLO THAR, other Mark Gatiss icon. :D

Your Mark Gatiss icon has truly impressive sideburns. :)

All the better to eat you with!

I mean, um ... actually I have no idea what I meant by that. Hurrah for your hilarious captions!

Not to trumpet my own attractiveness or anything, but I do kind of wonder if she didn't just want a guy buckling a belt "low and tight" for her :D

1) You have stolen my share of Amusing Airplane Anecdotes. I NEVER meet intersting people and you meet FAR too many.

2) You sister is old enough to have a boyfriend? Is this the birth of Overprotective!Sam?

I almost always have an...interesting time while traveling.

Nah, Emmy's a smart kid and she can look after herself. Though she also knows that I will, of course, fly to Austin and kill anyone should a) they hurt her and b) she so require.

I loooove Pirate Radio. Naive, yes, but also a lot of fun and great soundtrack.

That totally reminds me of that JD Salinger story in which someone says on a plane, iirc, "Mind you, they took a pint of pus out of that lovely young body of hers."

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Very true. The one that I think helped me get into grad school was the one Franny says about the "absolute Sarah Lawrence type [on the train[ who looked like she was wearing a leotard under her dress and had spent the whole time sculpting in the john."

I can't believe your sister is already old enough to have a boyfriend, Emo or other. Lordy, time flies.

I hope you have happy dreams, Sam. Merry Christmas!

If that's not the opening line of a story, then I'm living on the wrong planet.

Public transportation in the 'Thursday Next' universe tries to isolate holy rollers.

I wish I rode those vehicles.

I wish I had the choice to sit next to a Technobore or not. I'm always so fascinated by transportation and HOW DOES IT MOOOOOOVE, so I'd love someone who's passionate about that sort of things to explain them to me. It may get tiresome after six hours though...

I have a friend who works for London Underground. I will never get bored of the weird shit that goes down in that system.

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My favourite was the Christmas tree on the line at Kennington. They're still not sure how it got there.

...??

What? Details please!

The announcements of the delay were, and I quote, 'There is a delay on all Northern Line services due to a Christmas tree on the line at Kennington.'

Cue every soul in the station going 'What?' at the poor staff. Who were mostly going 'We have no clue. None. Must have been the wind. Please stop asking us!'

Strange man belting her in is probably all the action Holy Roller Lady is allowed.

This was kind of my thought...

I totally read that as "probably too busy doing his hair and contemplating his manpain to be dicking my sister, so I'll let him live."

Still no internets. Am totally exploiting the bandwidth of friends and family while down in Sydney. Well, I earned it. I brought them plums (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cherry_plum) I picked myself.

I read that too! I had to go back up and see what it actually said when I saw this.

No internets! D: Sorry to hear that.

I think you should write a short story that somehow incorporates that snippet of overheard conversation.

YES THIS!!!!

too busy doing his hair and contemplating his manpain to be a dick to my sister

That just cracks me up. But at least you give him a little credit. I'd probably hate my little sister's boyfriend on principle alone. (If she had one but she's too smart to be captured.)
Glad you made it in one piece!
I once spent an entire flight, including the hour spent sitting on the runway, trying to convince a crazy religious type to NOT talk to me.

I love you being on my lj. Jussayin'.

♥

AWWWW squirrelkisses!

Aren't you glad some weirdo pro-lifer accidentally emailed both of us? :D

Oh, Starbuck, my Starbuck .... yes I am! I'm also glad I replied all with my rant hahahhahahaa!!!

All I saw was "manpain" and I just started to laugh. a lot. loudly.

*sigh*

I've been up way to long thanks to a dog with dicky!bowls and a toilet with a dicky!seal. It's not Christmas in my house with out some sorta kerfuffle.

It's like the thing that I heard once that sometimes you overhear a really, really strange conversation, and if think too hard about it blood streams out of your nose. Example:

"I never would have made it through my first semester of college if it hadn't been for my horse."

What?????

I had to go find where I had heard this, and found a blog page dedicated to theories about what she actually meant. maybe someday the lady will see that page and tell us all about it
http://www.squidoo.com/IfItWerentForMyHorse

The Boat That Rocked (as it was released here) was a good time, but I am a sucker for (primarily) British people being ridiculous.

Oh my lord. Unrelated to your airplane adventurs (to which I add: you have more adventurs than anyone else I know), but: after you have seen the Christmas special, you should watch the Charlie McDonnell DW Confidentials (http://www.youtube.com/user/charlieissocoollike#g/c/B7C0C7636F1C8A5B) because they are kind of amazing (especially the final one).

I always have to get people to help me put bags in high places. I am short! And if there is a useful looking tall person stood next to me I'd rather just ask than stand on the seat. I once had to stand on the seat to get my bag down while holding a sleeping baby. That was fun. I didn't drop the bag or the baby. Go me!

"He was a preacher and he'd had six bypasses, and he was going to Vegas with his wife when she broke her hip, and I was left holding this body!"

Someone really needs to plug that in as a prompt on a Doctor Who or Torchwood fanfic request thread.

"He was a preacher and he'd had six bypasses, and he was going to Vegas with his wife when she broke her hip, and I was left holding this body!"

My interpretation: Wife broke hip, so couldn't go with Preacher to Vegas. Friend of Preacher (aka Person Overheard in Airport) went with Preacher instead. Preacher's heart couldn't handle the excitement of Vegas. Friend of Preacher had to accompany Preacher's body home.

Aww, we just watched Pirate Radio last week. I quite liked it.

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