(no subject)

[cblj_backup]

The alteration to this print is not initially evident, but closer inspection reveals that this predominantly naked Apollo is missing his genitalia. A viewer deliberately scraped away the ink at the god's crotch in a campaign of extremely localized censorship. Given how modestly Apollo was originally endowed, this change does not significantly alter the image overall. Rather, the god's sizable arrow quiver dangles more provocatively between his legs than his own penis ever did. The objecting viewer, apparently lacking a grasp of age-old visual puns, may not have realized that, with his alteration, the visual emphasis merely shifted to this larger and more obvious phallus substitute.

THIS IS THE FINEST MUSEUM INFORMATIONAL PLACARD I HAVE EVER READ.

I nipped down to the Art Institute this evening, because it's open late on Thursdays, and went to re-explore the "Altered And Adorned: Renaissance Prints In Daily Life" exhibit, which is closing July 10th. The text above is on a placard next to the work "Apollo Slays Python", which is tucked WAY IN THE BACK CORNER of the back room of the exhibit. Just for you guys, I dug up a copy of the image. That one has the penis intact, but you can see what they mean about Apollo's giant swingin' quiver.

I want to find the person who wrote that placard and buy them a drink. I don't think I've ever laughed that hard in a museum in my life.

Comments

[dramaturgca.livejournal.com]

That is indeed an excellent museum placard. I shall keep it in mind this weekend as I do fake museum placards for a lobby display.

[copperbadge.livejournal.com]

It has everything! Sex, irony, politics, dick jokes!

[itcamefromjapan.livejournal.com]

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA THAT IS AMAZING.

Also, now I want to start a band called God's Crotch.

[copperbadge.livejournal.com]

LOL, it reminds me of the yarn messageboard wank over God's pubic hair a few years ago...

[musikologie.livejournal.com]

Another triumphant addition to the "fractured penis" tag.

[copperbadge.livejournal.com]

And fodder for the novel I am totally going to write about historical cocks.

[silentstep.livejournal.com]

*bursts out laughing* Oh, no kidding. I took one look at that picture and went "HOLY- ahaha oh wait, that's just his quiver."

My day has been made.

[ysabet.livejournal.com]

That... just wow. That is a thing of beauty and a triumph of the displayer's art. The pic, on the other hand-- well, if you kept the quiver, it'd remind me of how my ex-husband saw himself; if you got rid of the quiver, it'd remind me of how he actually WAS.

>D

Also, are you familiar with Ursula Vernon's phalloi art? Here's (http://browse.deviantart.com/?qh=&section=&global=1&q=phalloi#/d1vkaj9) a fine example of one of her odder works, though I have to admit to a fondness for this one. (http://browse.deviantart.com/?qh=&section=&global=1&q=phalloi#/d1pxjo0)

[copperbadge.livejournal.com]

Wow. Ursula, you minx!

[rednwhiterose.livejournal.com]

Admit it, you just wanted to use your fractured penis tag. :O)

[copperbadge.livejournal.com]

Actually, what's hilarious is I posted it and then like ten minutes after I posted it went OH SHIT PENIS TAG and went back and tagged it :D

[fer-de-lance.livejournal.com]

That is an excellent placard, assuming the misspelling of "genitalia" in the first sentence isn't actually on it. :D

HAHAHA, that is indeed a gigantic quiver! A GIGANTIC COCKLIKE QUIVER.

[copperbadge.livejournal.com]

D'OH. No. It was spelled right on the placard.

[ellid.livejournal.com]

Goodness, that's a porky Apollo. Whyever would anyone find his ickle manhood immoral?

[lots42.livejournal.com]

Because some girls (and guys) think penises are neat. So cover it up.

[lots42.livejournal.com]

It sounds like something the Eleventh Doctor would write.

[altorogue.livejournal.com]

Dammit, I was there all afternoon yesterday, and that was the one thing I wanted to see then totally forgot about until right now. (!!!!!)

[tardis-stowaway.livejournal.com]

That museum placard is genius. Whoever wrote it deserves some sort of award.

I love that the fractured penis tag is proving surprisingly versatile!

[ncp.livejournal.com]

Comment twins!

[ncp.livejournal.com]

It's kind of amazing how versatile your "fractured penis" tag turned out to be.

[copperbadge.livejournal.com]

Okay there ACTUALLY WERE two of you who said the fractured penis tag was versatile, I'm not insane. Phew.

[kaesa.livejournal.com]

As I was reading this, I was like "...you know, this sounds really familiar," and then I remembered that my friend Katie had copied it down while she was at the museum because she thought it was just that great, and then read it aloud to me to convince me to go see the exhibit.

Everyone loves Apollo the dickless wonder, I guess! Also, I should probably go see it.

[copperbadge.livejournal.com]

You really should -- it closes next week and the exhibit alone is worth the cost of admission, especially for the astrolabes and pop-up anatomy books.

[blamebrampton.livejournal.com]

Whoever wrote that placard deserves almost all the chocolate in the world!

[of-polyhymnia.livejournal.com]

That is one of the most awesome things I've ever read.

And it's made more awesome by the fact that I just submitted my masters dissertation.

...as I'm telling everyone I can find. :-D

[copperbadge.livejournal.com]

Congratulations! Isn't it a wonderful feeling?

[metallumai.livejournal.com]

The print itself is pretty amusing: "OK, stay right there, I'ma shoot you!" "Aw, maaan. OW, STOP IT!!"

[copperbadge.livejournal.com]

"Apollo! I thought it was my turn to eat you this week!"

[firynze.livejournal.com]

...I truly hope to someday get to write museum informational placards like this.

[illariy.livejournal.com]

LOL, that is indeed a great placard. Best museum writing ever. I would love to read that writer's column.

The Altered and Adorned curator speaks!

[(Anonymous)]

Greetings everybody,

I'm the curator of Altered and Adorned: Using Renaissance Prints in Daily Life, and I work at the Art Institute. There are plenty more penis jokes to be had if you consider the fact that the anatomy flap prints on view in the next room has a literally pop-up penis (and other intentionally removable organs) . . . Check it out in the catalogue, on the Art Institute blog (http://blog.artic.edu/blog/2011/06/09/more-organs/) and most importantly, in the exhibition before it closes on July 10!
Suzanne Karr Schmidt

P.S. Feel free to contact the museum for my email at aic.publicaffairs@artic.edu if you've enjoyed the show. I might even give you a tour if you act quickly enough.

P.P.S. Despite Apollo's indeed rather modest endowment, there is at least one other impression of the print with a very localized hole. Who knew he'd be so objectionable!!?

Re: The Altered and Adorned curator speaks!

[copperbadge.livejournal.com]

Thanks for dropping a comment! I truly did enjoy the Altered and Adorned exhibit (I love the pop-ups). I'll be linking that blog catalogue post and the information you added.

[margi-lynn.livejournal.com]

This is the most amazing post :D

That really cheered me up and made my day ♥

Once Again into the Breech!

[(Anonymous)]

http://blog.artic.edu/blog/2011/07/05/last-chance-for-renaissance-porn/

Since your previous coverage of my exhibit was so revealing, here's my final post to the Art Institute blog. This exchange is getting a little meta, but what the heck . . . (note the extreme detail!) Also, I plead innocent for the choice of the verb 'bone up'.
cheers,
Suzanne

Re: Once Again into the Breech!

[copperbadge.livejournal.com]

Hah! That's the best print close-up EVER. And you linked to me! I burst out laughing.

Whenever I visit the exhibit I see things I missed before -- this latest time it was the reliquary with the actual relic still in it. So I guess I see bones every time I go...:)

Anyway, I've linked the new blog post here, just in case you'd like to see:

http://copperbadge.livejournal.com/3316983.html

[firesprite1105.livejournal.com]

OMG....STILL...FUNNY!

[ravenofdreams.livejournal.com]

I love this post, and this entire comment thread, and the magical pubic hair, and silly censors, and all of you.

[copperbadge.livejournal.com]

I FEEL THE LOVE.