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GOOD MORNING WOULD YOU LIKE SOME LINKS

First off: kaimu_art, in the spirit of tw_season_zero, has drawn an awesome "reaction sketch" to The Making Of Toshiko. :D I love her comments about not wanting Ianto to cheat on Lisa.

For those of you not following the Mario di Nes thread, I bring you the Ladies of the Court, the nobless d'goomba: Princess Toadstool VII by garoben and her maid-in-waiting, the Lady Peach (what a tarte) by bluejeanius.

In news of Fire of the Crystal Elven Magesword of Dragonstar: The Pegasus Chronicles, Book Three: The Moonwand Cycle, darthhellokitty linked me to a SomethingAwful post about a terrible fantasy novel called Dragons of Autumn Twilight. I swear to you, on my brother's lack of taste, I found this book in his bookshelf and traded it on Swaptree for a copy of Titan AE. HAND TO GOD.

There is also now a Fire of the Crystal Elven Magesword tag. See top of post! :D

Aaaand finally, cageyklio linked me to a Grow Your Own Doctor kit being discussed on Etsy. I would now like to reenact for you the conversation which followed:

Klio: Of course, my brain then went to a completely unnecessary and gratuitous "Grow Your Own Jack Harkness" kit. Warning, proximity to Ianto Jones may cause spontaneous growth.
Sam: The "Grow your own Jack Harkness" kit comes in a discreet paper bag with a very interestingly-shaped watering pot.
Klio: Oh, so that's what the Neti pot is for.

I am totally going to mock up a graphic design for a Grow Your Own Captain kit, print it on brown paper, fold it up like a seed packet, and tie it to the penis pot.

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Those of you who faintly recall Coworker J will be pleased to know that he is returning to us as a full-time employee next week. I happened to find an old email I wrote about him a while ago, and thought I would share the relevant portion:

Sam: Have you seen Sylvester Stallone recently? He's fuckin' terrifying.
J: He looks like he eats babies for breakfast. Hot buttered babies.
Sam: They plump when you cook 'em!

And then one of our coworkers was walking by and got all scandalized and he had to scurry off with the mail while I pretended I wasn't making jokes about babies in microwaves.

That is how cool Coworker J The Possible Cosplayer is.

His return is such good news, you guys have no idea. I'm chained to my desk for about 86% of my day, and when J was here he was my mobile half. Plus he got all the really awesome gossip. He is my ninja office boy sidekick.

HOORAY!

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Ladies and Gentlemen, and the rest of you:

I present to you the culmination of a little project that started three years ago in a Graduate Teaching Office somewhere in the vast midwest.

The Alum's Guide To Getting Through University was an extended essay I created to upload all my thoughts on my waning career as a graduate student and provide advice to a couple of people who were soon to be shipping off for their freshman year. In the past few years I've been proud that people have returned to comment on its usefulness; I like to be useful. I submitted it to a few educational-guidebook companies but got no bites (not surprising) so I decided to self-publish it.

The end result is a slick, updated new guide entitled "Other People Can Smell You," which I am offering on Lulu.com not only as a hardcopy pocket-sized handbook but also as a free download. I would recommend not purchasing the hardcopy just yet; the first printing is on its way to me now because I have some concerns about the margins in their preview and also the back cover, which in the digital version looks like crap and I'm not sure why. Please feel free to download; it doesn't cost either of us anything. You can access the free downloadable version here, at my storefront, or take a look through it and purchase the hardcopy (which is actually a softcopy considering it's a pocket paperback) at the sales page. In the interests of full disclosure, with media mail postage the book will run you $11 even. Of that, I make fifty five cents. :D Swanky cover, no?