(no subject)

[cblj_backup]

Today I am the most misunderstood person on the internet. Not in any kind of sad, emo way, it hasn't been a bad day exactly. It's just that I am literally not making myself understood. I am cross-communicating with a vengeance. ENGLISH, WHY HAVE YOU ABANDONED ME.

We got three calls today from people wanting to talk to "the person in charge of fundraising". We are a business in charge of fundraising, but it's very difficult to make people understand this. We don't need to sell chocolates, sir or madam, we're a little beyond that now. No, there's nobody in charge of fundraising, or rather in a limited way everyone here is.

I had to explain our new security system to someone, again, but after 300 repetitions of this explanation, TODAY I effed it up.

I have three different web browsers, but only one of them currently functions well enough for me to order dinner. And it's Internet Explorer.

And then there was this thing with a man looking for a dentist, except I don't speak Arabic so it took us a while to establish that he was not in the dentist's office. (We did establish that he was from Egypt before we established that he was in search of a dentist. I googled one for him.)

I wrote the above while recovering from dinner, and then I looked down at my foot, which was tingling, and discovered that at some point during the meal I had ripped a three-inch gash in the side of my left foot. So now I'm not even communicating with my own nerve endings.

I don't have band-aids long enough for this, but I do have superglue!

Guys, don't let me glue my foot into a sock. That would just be embarrassing.

Comments

[mrsalemp.livejournal.com]

I'm not allowed to use the skin superglue anymore. It is REALLY easy to glue stuff to yourself when already injured. BE CAREFUL. Otherwise you'll be trying to tear the sock or whaterever off your skin and make the original cut worse :(

[martinius.livejournal.com]

This is what happens when I don't read comments before commenting myself; you can buy tissue glue over there? Here it's only available to hospitals.

[drunkoffthestars]

I think it is entirely possible that he is using actualfax superglue. word on the street is that it works. http://www.ehow.com/how_4450308_use-superglue-cuts.html

[keeperofqkeys.livejournal.com]

Super glue was actually originally designed to be used in lieu of stitches.

[drunkoffthestars]

no shit! one of the links I saw seemed to be saying it was kinda toxic, but I guess needs must and all that.

[keeperofqkeys.livejournal.com]

Wikipedia (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cyanoacrylate) tells me that apparently only some formulations are toxic and some aren't (and apparently super glue + cotton/wool = fire!)

[bare-bear.livejournal.com]

*shifty eyes*

SOUNDS LIKE SCIENCE TIME!!! :D

[skoosan.livejournal.com]

Confirmed: last time I used superglue I tried to clean up a spill with a paper towel. SO MUCH SMOKE.

[viper-rock.livejournal.com]

Which is why accidentally spilling super glue on my pants when wearing them was such a bad idea...

[darkbunny.livejournal.com]

Well, after they figured out that it couldn't be used to make cockpit windows on fighter jets.

[martinius.livejournal.com]

I think you have a different kind of superglue than we do...

We have this family anecdote that once my great grandfather was out sailing and one of the fillings in his teeth dropped out, so he put it back using superglue. And then he had migraine for like a month, but he didn't go to the dentist, stubborn bastard :p

[mrsalemp.livejournal.com]

We can buy Liquid Bandage. I don't know if it's as strong as what the hospitals have, but it's more than enough to cause embarrassing glue mishaps.

[martinius.livejournal.com]

Apparently a surgeon at the ER I used to work once managed to glue his finger to a little boy's forehead...

[mrsalemp.livejournal.com]

must not laugh. must not laugh. must not laugh.

[sirlig.livejournal.com]

*is laughing, helplessly*

How did he get the finger off?!

[copperbadge.livejournal.com]

Oh, I use plain old superglue. Works just as well, though it's probably not as sanitary or more toxic or something.

[mrsalemp.livejournal.com]

I think you're just missing out on an antiseptic or something like that.

[copperbadge.livejournal.com]

Well, I put Neosporin on it first, but I had to wipe most of it away because the superglue wouldn't stick otherwise.

[mrsalemp.livejournal.com]

You cleaned it out before sealing it up, and that's the important part. I say this with all the expertise I possess as Medic For Pretend.

[copperbadge.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I have a lot of experience in Fixing Myself After Damaging Myself. :D

[adina-atl.livejournal.com]

The vet clinic I worked at in high school used plain old superglue for surgeries with no problem. Well, except for that incident where Doctor Becky glued her glove to the cat's paw, but "surgical grade" wouldn't have prevented that.

Just use a fresh tube each time.