(no subject)

Look, dude, I don't care if you're from Florida. You being from Florida has no bearing on my continued inability to give you directions to a building I do not work in. Discovering that you are from Florida is not going to magically convince me to tell you something I do not know.

Stop calling me, or if you cannot stop, if you are compelled to call me by some uncontrollable inner demon, stop hanging up when I put you on hold while I try to find someone to help you. Something I am doing voluntarily, as I have no stake in whether your meeting with them goes well or not.

Since I don't work for them. Or indeed in the same building as them.

That being said, it did add variety to my morning, which otherwise consisted of doing the paperwork for the safety teams on each of our floors. As the Safety Captain, it is my job to wear a stupid orange hat during fire drills and take the blame for everything that goes wrong. And, of course, do the paperwork.

Appropriately, while I'm in Safety Captain mode, a Public Service Announcement:

johncwright writes science fiction and nonfiction metacommentary and apparently also has strong feelings about how homosexuals rape animals and corpses.

I'd stay away from commenting on that post, because assholes tend to be unarguable, but I'd also stay away from his books.

PSA for the day ended.

(no subject)

In honour of johncwright locking comments to his post and spending a lot of time and energy to try and tell us we're wrong (poor insecure kid) (See also: links to his wife's epic racefail), I've decided to post the opening of The Valet Of Anize. I needed a kick in the pants!

(I'm going to take credit for him locking comments, since he did it like twenty seconds after I said to Kita in his journal that I thought not buying his books would be nice, but writing better books would be even more awesome, and also judging from his reviews not all that difficult. SORRY I SCARED YOU, JOHNNY. WAIT, NO I'M NOT.)

OKAY. Let's get this show on the road, shall we?

Here is an Index Post for future reference, which also has a "Back of the Book" summary if you want to be a bit spoiled.

The Valet Of Anize - Chapter One
Trains, muffins with jam in, fistfights, religion, and the potential for a whole lot of buyer's remorse.

The Valet Of Anize - opening of Chapter Two (incomplete so far)
Valet gains an ally, spies on Dr. Anizin, gets a name, and makes breakfast.

One last thing: NONE OF YOU DESERVE THIS WARNING, but I'm going to say it anyway in the interests of clarity:

Sexuality, gender, and gender presentation are complicated subjects. My degrees are in theatre, not gender studies, so I may get some things wrong. I hope they will be minimal. I welcome concrit on all matters though at this stage it's mostly going to go into a file for later rewrites. I hope I've proven with Nameless that I can adjust my thinking if need be -- the Boy in Nameless is, I think, an excellent example of a compromise between reader expectations and artistic integrity.

Please feel free to discuss things in comments -- I want discussion! -- but please keep an open mind and a polite countenance if you do so. I am striving my best to do the same. If I see a discussion getting out of hand I will slam down on it; if people are feeling dogpiled, they should definitely speak up so I can deal with that.

Not that I expect this from the Cafe. We're all grownups here and about 99% of the time we act like it, which is why I love you and make shiny things for you. :)

(no subject)

OH MY GOD YOU GUYS.

IT ACTUALLY IS MY FAULT.

BRB LAUGHING FOREVER.

Look! I'M CRAVEN.

On a meta level it is intriguing and fairly revolting that he didn't freak out until OMG ANOTHER BOY came on the scene. Sorry, ladies, apparently you're only relevant if you have a penis attached.

On a secondary level, I'm pretty sure I didn't say "troll this idiot" anywhere. In fact I'm pretty sure I said not to, and in the comment that drew his attention to it I said nothing worse than "Two thousand people just decided not to buy your books".

C'est la vie.